Silent Desperation
by Lady Chekov
Summary: This is my fist RH fic...It happens to be a song-fic to Tia Carrere's song, "I Never Even Told You." Syd is engaged and Nigel is thinking...


Dissclaimer: I don't own RH, I'm not really sure who does...but it's not me. The song "I Never Even Told You," is owned by Tia Carrere and in her album "Dream."  
  
  
  
  
Sydney Fox was getting married.  
It was absolutely unbelievable!!  
Nigel's thought were spinning, crashing.   
It was just...  
AWLFUL!!  
The young Englishman strode down the soaked pavement, the moist concrete glimmering like unshed tears. The rain plunked dolefully on nearby rooftops and thumped against the street.  
  
"There was never any question, any lover's indiscretion in my eyes.   
And in my quiet desperation wasn't any indication that my life could suddenly change and never be the same.  
Now I feel so ashamed."  
  
The wind buffeted his ears and the rain stung at his flushed face. He yanked up his collar and yelled aloud into the nasty weather,  
"It's bloody impossible!! Sydney engaged!!!"  
She'd had countless swooning beaus, dozens of dashing adventurers...  
And now, she was going to marry the new department head at Trinity, a regular guy, just like that.   
And Nigel felt so...so..... He cursed himself, angry at the empty emotion so apparent in his heart.  
It's your own STUPID fault, you bumbling fool. If only...you'd...if....  
  
"I never even told you. I thought you knew.  
I never even said a word about how I feel about you. I never even told you. I thought you knew.  
Thought you knew."  
  
  
He recalled how bright her eyes with excitement her eyes had been when she'd shown him her gaudy engagement ring, with it's huge diamond center glaring at him.  
He'd had to look aside and he'd sat heavily in his desk chair with his eyes turned politely away from the woman he admired.  
Her lovely face had immediately fallen,  
"Nigel, aren't you happy for me??"  
He'd opened his mouth once, then the determination faded and he forced a shaky smile for her instead...  
  
"There was any mention, though it wasn't my intention not to say.  
But my silent desperation wouldn't change my situation away."  
  
A pair of blazing headlights broke through the mist and a sleek car pulled up to Nigel's left. He swallowed hard as he recognized it, and tried not to avert his gaze when Sydney rolled down her window and scrutinized her wet assistent.  
"Hey, Nige, you look like you could use a lift..."  
She raised one eyebrow and gave him a familar smirk.  
  
"And doesn't it seem strange how everything can change.   
And still feel the same. I never even told you. I thought you knew.  
I never even said a word about how I feel about you. I never even told you. I thought you knew."  
  
"S-sure, Syd," Nigel stammered and scrambled to get into her car. He swiped the rain from his fringe of hair, and stared out his window at the rain. In the glass reflection, he could see Sydney frowning at the back of his head.  
"You know, you've been pretty quiet lately, Nigel. What's wrong??"  
  
"I had to keep my feelings locked away.  
I couldn't whisper, no I couldn't say.   
Now I know what this costs, my chances are lost.  
Like tears, tears in the rain."  
  
Don't loose your chance, Nigel, the flustered Englishman told himself. This is the moment of truth. If you say nothing now, you will never have this wonderful woman. Sydney will marry the dorty man who placed the bloody winking diamond on her hand. You have to say something....You have to tell her how you feel....You've stayed quiet for so long...you HAVE TO-  
  
"I never even told you. I thought you knew."  
  
Nigel wet his cotton dry lips and looked at her. YOU HAVE TO SAY-  
  
"I never even said a word about how I feel about you."  
  
"Sydney...I...I LOVE you!"  
The car screeched to a halt on the muddy street. Startled dark eyes met and clasped in the dim light. Two spell-bound colleagues stared at each other across the car, their heavy silence punctuated by the ever-beating rain, which pulsed in rythem to two quick hearts.  
  
The End~*~  
  
  
You can decide what happens after that..... 


End file.
